“AI-Generated Paint Names Confuse Industry: 'Cosmic Pigeon' Becomes an Unlikely Hit”

The home improve­ment world was turned upside down last week when one major paint man­u­fac­tur­er began rolling out unusu­al names for their paint colors. 

“We always try to add a touch of whim­sy and cre­ativ­i­ty,” said one ner­vous spokesper­son, who request­ed that they remain anonymous.

But this cer­tain­ly seemed to be more than “…a touch of whim­sy.” Despite obvi­ous backpedal­ing, Pandora’s box has remained open since ​“Cos­mic Pigeon” flut­tered onto the fan decks, then was announced ​“col­or of the year” by indus­try experts 

Short­ly there­after Win­ter­time Thigh dom­i­nat­ed the ​“cool neu­tral” scene, fol­lowed close­ly in pop­u­lar­i­ty by the soft, mut­ed green of Exis­ten­tial Artichoke. 

“I’ll tell you exact­ly what hap­pened,” said anoth­er spokesper­son, this time for a major com­peti­tor. ​“Some­body got lazy and start­ed using the robots. You know, the chat BBP or what­ev­er it is. We’ve lost the human touch, and now we’re all stuck with Pen­sive Pan­da and Dystopi­an Dis­co Dilemma.”

Home­own­ers, how­ev­er, seem large­ly undis­turbed. Par­ents-to-be Susan and Ravi are mak­ing the final selec­tion for their baby’s nurs­ery, tak­ing the paint col­or names in stride. ​“We’re just try­ing to decide between After-Hours Haze and Sul­try Nights,” says Susan with a smile, hold­ing both swatch­es up to the light. ​“They both seem so nice.”

Whether it’s the pub­lic­i­ty stunt of the cen­tu­ry or some­one let the robots take over, this year’s paint picks are cer­tain­ly unforgettable.